Molly & Chiari

Molly Update 2.4.09

2233506Just returned from Madison, Wisconsin where Molly met with pediatric neurosurgeon Dr. Ishkandar for a "second opinion" on her Chiari I Malformation and 2 brain surgeries (catch up here).  Ishkandar is a friend and respected colleague of Molly's neurosurgeon, Dr. Frim.  And they somewhat regularly refer patients to each other when they may benefit from "fresh" eyes. 

Dr. Ishkandar works at the American Family Children's Hospital in Madison.  He has been out of the country until recently, so Molly was finally able to meet with him.  He reviewed all of Molly's MRI's, Dr. Frim's operating room notes, and took down everything about her story from first symptoms to today.  Lots of info, lots of questions. 

He has basically asked for 2 tests.  First is a sleep test (overnight) in order to determine if there is something about her sleep that is making it less productive: apnea, brain activity, etc.  Second is a neuro-psych test (3-4 hours) that is a comprehensive test of her IQ, mental abilities, comprehension, and tons of stuff.  That is probably the most important test right now to determine where her deficiencies are and try to find ways to help.

Ishkandar thinks that Molly's post-surgery neurological issues (thinking, problem solving, finishing thoughts, etc) can be helped.  Her neurologist thinks the same, but this test is another big step in that direction.

The tone of the meeting was positive. He sees her as improving, even if plateued a bit.  He really believes it may take up to a year to see the full benefit of the surgery.  He sees no need for further surgery.  All MRI's look as they should.

Generally we are very pleased with the meeting. It confirms where we think we are right now, that things are getting better and that nothing can be done anatomically to improve things.  Another surgery would, in fact, probably make things worse at this point. 

Thanks for your prayers and notes today.  It may take a couple of months (at least) to get in for the tests.  We'll let you know if/when something gets on the calendar.

Molly Update 1.20.2009

3180641996_0fa3e5e14fIt's been a while since I gave you a full update of how Molly is doing.  If you don't know, my wife was diagnosed in 2007 with Chiari I Malformation. You can catch up here.

This is as good as Molly has felt since surgery in September of 2008.  It seems that the neurologist's effort to get Molly sleeping has worked wonders. 

Molly is taking medication every night just before bed and she is sleeping much better.  The neurologist thinks that the very difficult post-op problems and the rounds of steroids she took got her inner sleep clock way off.  He also says she likely has "brain damage" both from the surgeries (as with any surgery) as well as from the scar tissue that forms from exposing the brain and other tissues to the outside world.  She's in bed every night at right about 9pm and up at 6am or so. Over the past few weeks there is a marked difference in how good she feels, which is obvious to me as well.

Mol's balance issues are still there a bit, but not too bad.  She hasn't used a cane for many weeks now.  She is able to go to the gym and do low-impact stuff.  She also uses the treadmill at the house. The neurologist doesn't want her running, though she really wants to.  She does power-walking.  She has also just started using a Wii Fit, which is pretty cool.  It's really helpful for her with balance issues as well as other exercise.

The brain issues, including finishing her thoughts and doing more complicated mental calculations and similar stuff is still obviously there.  She is playing Brain Age daily on the Nintendo DS Lite that I got her for Christmas, as the doc recommended.  She is also, almost daily, playing some games (like Mancala) that require her to use fine motor skills.  Her ability to do simple things, like pick up a penny, has been finally improving.

All-in-all, Molly has been greatly improving and now has a bunch of energy and motivation.  We really want to thank everyone who has been praying for her recovery.

We are still looking to a second opinion in February, if that appointment works out. It may be pushed back.  That's the next step, and it will determine the steps after that.

The 2009 Reformission

DSC_00161I've identified 10 changes I want to see in my life in 2009.  Call them resolutions if you like.  I have much more I could say about them, but I wanted them to be somewhat brief here.  The first 3 are general and pervasive through the next 7, and are things I've been working on for years (ordering not important).  The last 7 are more specific (and in order).  I know that it's really God who works change, and that everything below should say "Lord-willing" after it, but just accept that up front if you would.

10. A year of clearer boundaries.  I'm thinking of several areas here including the areas of hospitality (more at #6), personal organization, what I do in my different workplaces, time with my wife (more at #2), what we let our kids do and not do, etc.  This isn't about "tighter" boundaries necessarily (well, maybe in a few areas).  But muddy boundaries make for a muddy life.  Clarity is, well, clarifying. 

9. A year of fewer excuses.  I'm sick of my mind running to look for better excuses for why things aren't different, better, possible.  I've been working on this area for some time because it's a tough one for me. I'm going to work at dropping excuses, admit when I'm wrong, and press on.  "Do or do not. There is no 'try.'"

8. A year of greater risk.  Comfort is an easy default mode for me.  Risk is a sexy word to me, and a sexy idea.  But all too often it's a word and idea and not much else.  This year when I catch myself being too protective or fearful (also see #7) I'm going to try and let go and go for it.  I'm still going to count the cost, I'm just going to try and not selfishly count the cost.

_____

7. A year of saying what needs to be said.  I'm a prophet-type guy.  I used to be the guy who would say things and then find out later that I was actually very bold and courageous and truthful and transformational, though at the time it didn't feel at all courageous.  I've been tamed a bit, and I'm sick of it.  This year I'm going to speak when I feel led to instead of feeling later on that I should have said something.  This will result in things from more direct evangelism, to more regular meetings with church folks who are slacking, to a louder public voice in my city, to many other things. 

6. A year of expanding our "public" space.  I'm thinking mostly hospitality and relational discipleship here.  Some things have led us to restrict levels of private space and too rarely invite people in.  Most of those things are stupid and selfish.  We are going to try to open our home more, enjoy the company of friends and strangers more, etc.  We used to influence people more through things like letting them be around parenting situations.  This worked especially well with university students.  We don't do that enough anymore.  We have been really changed over the years by hanging around older Christians, pastors, and others and watching their life, asking questions, and just sitting and soaking in the relationship.  We need to be more intentional about being there for others.

5. A year of scheduling mission.  This has always been something I've done, but it's waned and I want to get serious about it again.  Unscheduled mission is always easier for me (ALWAYS!) when scheduled mission is happening.  So really this will help scheduled and unscheduled mission.  I've already added some significant chunks into my winter schedule. I'm going to vary the locations, means, and approach.  Along with this I have some ideas from last year that we shelved until some core changes happen at our church, which are coming very soon (see #4).

4. A year of church transformation.  Starting in a few weeks the changes I've been working for at my church for more than 4 1/2 years are finally going to start happening.  We are working on reconstituting, restarting, and renaming our church.  That's just the beginning.  Last year we made some important decisions and went through some real pain to make what's happening in 2009 a reality.  Should be a busy, fruitful, exciting, and risky year.  I'll try to keep you posted here. 

3. A year of discipling our children better.  Last year discipleship was just ok.  We are still not close to what I want for my kids.  I have a picture of what I want to see in their lives, of how I want them to experience the gospel, truth, faith, ministry, and compassion.  Now we will day-by-day begin, one stroke at a time, to paint that picture. 

2. A year of rediscovering my wife.  The end of 2008 was really difficult for my marriage.  We never grew apart or stopped loving or liking each other or anything like that.  But most of my readers know how really tough these last few months have been.  When you spend all the time thinking about how your car isn't working right you never get to experience the joy of being on the road.  You get too focused on the problems.  Same with our relationship.  We need to get out and feel the wind in our hair and hug a few turns on the country roads again, even if Molly's issues mean it will be at a slower speed.  This means things like getting date nights back in order, finding more time in the evenings to just hang and talk about something other than what's wrong with Molly, and me stopping being such a jerk. :)

1. A year of responding better to the Holy Spirit's promptings.  I've noticed, especially over the last half of the year, some things in my life that just aren't in order.  They get better, and then worse again.  I going to spend more time preaching the gospel to myself.  I'm going to refresh the disciplines while also simplifying things a bit.  I'm going to be more protective of times of silence and solitude. I'm looking forward to a growing intimacy with the Lord over 2009.

Lots-o-Links 12.30.08

Brief Molly Update: Mayo Clinic has turned Molly away.  Twenty minutes before leaving for my Dad's house for Christmas Molly received the letter saying that they turn down a lot of people and that Molly isn't a good candidate for an appointment.  Essentially they don't think they would find a solution to Molly's Chiari issues.  Maybe it's because they know Molly's surgeon is already a recognized expert and he would know more than they would. Dunno. We can appeal that decision by sending any info that may change their minds.  I don't know that we have anything like that.  Still looking into it, and other options.  Molly has been sleeping a lot better with her new sleep meds.  Glad for that.

Two quick prayer requests...

  • David Wayne (JollyBlogger) has colon cancer and is now home after surgery.
  • A good friend and pastor, Shawn Kemp (no, not that one), has to go 3 weeks without talking: "I have a cyst on my vocal cord. I have to go without talking for three weeks in an attempt to let it heal. If it doesn't heal, I will have to have surgery to remove it....there is a risk that it would leave me permanently hoarse."

Links...

Run to Amazon to download The 99 Most Essential Beethoven Masterpieces for $1.99.  World class orchestras and artists in this collection.  I'm listening to it now and it's wonderful.  C'mon, 2 bucks!  Go get it now because the SALE ENDS TODAY!

2009 is the 500th anniversary of the birth of John Calvin, so decorate your church stage with tulips!  Or maybe make it a year of reading Calvin.  Here's a year through the Institutes reading guide.  The Reformation 21 guys are blogging through Calvin's Institutes in 2009 (You can request a reading schedule).  John Piper's new book John Calvin and His Passion for the Majesty of God is officially released tomorrow.  Piper's pastor's conference message on Calvin is also worth a listen (or re-listen).

I don't think I've linked to this yet (and it's late), but Tim Keller had a Christmas article in Christianity Today: "The Advent of Humility."

JD Greear:

Todd Hiestand: Books of 2008 - Leadership

Barnabas Piper: 22 things I admire about my parents on their 40th anniversary

Tim Chester has a new book coming out - The Ordinary Hero: Living the Cross and Resurrection

Virtual church leader hangout at www.churchstaffbreakroom.com

The year in photographs - 2008

Lots-o-Links 12.16.08

Brief Molly Update: We are going to Molly's neurologist today. He will hear that the medications are not working so far.  Then we will hear whether Molly's EEG shows us anything worth knowing.  And all of this is contingent upon the weather not being so bad that we can't go since it's in Crystal Lake and a snow storm is coming.

Jonathan Dodson: Four Church Planting Manuals Reviewed

The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary now offers a PhD in having a quiet time

David Allen has a new book, Making It All Work: Winning at the Game of Work and Business of Life

This 9Marks video is kinda funny.  "It's calligraphy. I can't even read it."

Stephen King lists his 10 best movies of the year

Keller and Powlison: Pastor's Self-Evaluation Questionnaire

John Frame: Christ and Culture audio

Trevin Wax wants you to have some good books...for free

Very excited about Jerram Barrs' newest book coming in May of '09: Learning Evangelism from Jesus

Lots-o-Links 12.8.08

Banner_00017I got an email from my buddy, Marcus, at TheHighCalling.org and he told me one of my articles is now listed as a Best of 2008 article on their site.  Very cool. 

Brief Molly Update: Molly is spending the night awake tonight so she can have an EEG test in the morning. If you think of it, pray for her.  She is already exhausted and struggling the last few days with sleep.  She is sleeping longer but not better.  So tonight is going to be rough for her.

I've started to add music recommendations as well as poetry recommendations to my Amazon Store. Shop there and help the Reformissionary!

David Fitch discusses Dan Kimball and missional vs. attractional...and Tim Keller comments a couple of times.  Fun.

Jeremy Pryor is thinking about the centrality of the prayer meeting.

Ligon Duncan has some good thoughts on a gospel culture in the local church.

Justin Buzzard lists 20 books to read in your 20's.

John Piper on why God is not a megalomaniac in demanding to be worshipped.

Sam Storms is starting to list his recommended New Testament commentaries.  Right on so far in my estimation.

N500389893_989192_769 Joe Thorn tagged me in Facebook and said I'm this, uh, person.  If everyone on Facebook who even remotely likes me and who is Joe Thorn's Facebook friend would tag Joe Thorn in one random, funny, or odd place, I would be eternally grateful.

Molly Update: Neurologist Appointment

Just got home from Molly's appointment with her neurologist.  She hasn't seen him since June of '07, which was soon after her symptoms from Chiari I Malformation first showed up.  So since then Molly has had one surgery with the elimination of all symptoms and another surgery which at this point hasn't helped.  The doctor has thrown 4 things at us...

1. To help with her "jolting" issue, which he thinks may be like mini-seizures, she is getting medication.  We'll see if it helps.

2. Molly is now taking a vitamin to help with thinking/memory issues byexpanding blood vessels in her brain.  I may swipe some of that for myself. :) I can't remember the name at the moment.

3. To help with sleep Molly got a sample pack of Ambien CR. We'll see how much that helps.

4. The doctor recommended a 15-20% wedge to elevate her head and upper body at night, since lying flat seems to create some of the sleep issues.

It's apparent that we are dealing with symptom alleviation rather than fixes.  We are guessing this is what life will be like for Molly now.  We are still looking into second opinions and possible re-exploratory surgery, but nothing major will be happening until at least after the holidays.

Lots-o-Links 12.2.08

Quick Molly Update: Molly has been doing a little better lately.  She is even starting to sleep on her own (without meds).  It's not every night, but it's getting better.  When she sleeps well her Chiari symptoms seem to be significantly better the next day.  When she sleeps poorly, her Chiari symtoms get all jacked up.  She still isn't sleeping deeply and consistently, but things are headed in a better direction.  We are going to her neurologist (not neurosurgeon) today to ask about the sleep issue.  Hopefully he will have some insights.  Thanks for your continued prayers for my wife and family.

Here's the Advent devotional my family is using (via). We are also using selections from the excellent Come, Thou Long-Expected Jesus: Experiencing the Peace and Promise of Christmas.

Karis Church's Theology Weekend audio featuring Bruce Ware is up

ESV SB for your mobile phone - $29

Dan Kimball has some missional misgivings

Mark Driscoll on The Mission and Vision of the Acts 29 Network. It's nice to follow Mark over the past few years and hear the the ways he's changed as well as how he hasn't changed.

Paste Magazine lists their top movies of 2008

Roger Ebert on the death of the film critic (via)

The New York Times: 100 Notable Books of 2008

Lots-o-Links 11.18.08

Quick Molly & Elijah Update: Molly has had a few really great days.  Better balance, more energy, more driving with less danger, etc.  Very excited.  Maybe finally catching up on sleep is doing something.  Elijah had a 102+ fever for 6 days, which included several hours at the hospital for IV fluids, but is back to his normal self.  So glad for that.

In 2 days the Catalyst One Day Conference hits Granger, Indiana.  If you are nearby you should go.  Should be great, and I believe registration is still open.  I'm actually still considering going, but haven't decided yet.

I've been dealing with male leadership in the home with some church members recently.  Here are some complementarian resources I've found helpful on this issue from The Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood website...

    Fifty Crucial Questions (John Piper)
    Summaries of the Egalitarian and Complementarian Positions (Bruce Ware)
    We Need Some Leaders! (Bob Lepine)

Download Driscoll's Porn-Again Christian in full.

Desiring God's 2009 Pastor's Conference is on evangelism.

Tim Chester has provided a narrative statement of faith. (HT)

Resurgence; Six ways to engage culture.

Lots-o-Links 11.12.08

Brief Molly Update: We are not going to Chicago tomorrow for Molly's spinal tap because of Elijah's ongoing sickness. Unsure whether the next step will be the spinal or second opinion. Stay tuned and thanks for praying. By the way, we will be looking into a handicapped tag for the van as navigating 1/2 a parking lot is quite a chore for her.  But we are grateful she is going to be able to start driving a little.

Looking forward to the ESV Study Bible going mobile soon

If you have no style or need something better, here are three steps to building your individual style

Learn to give and take criticism like a man.

Second Rate Snacks = Awesome.

Saralyn really likes Practical Theology for Women by Wendy Alsup.  We have copies (unless they are sold out) on our church book table.

Ed Stetzer: Simply Missional.

Tim Chester: Creating Communities of Grace.

Lots-o-Links 11.5.08

DSC_0015Quick Molly Update: Molly is about to lose it.  She is averaging somewhere around 3 hours of sleep a day or less for the last 6 weeks.  No joke.  She has maybe had two nights where she slept at least 6 hours.  She has had several nights where she didn't even doze off.  We thought it was the steroids taken in the first few weeks.  It's clear that it's so much more than that.  This morning was a breaking point.  She has gone from acting sluggish and tired to wanting to punch me in the face.  That's not all that uncommon, but it's much more than normal.  Let me explain how bad things are...

This morning we sat down to talk and she started to tear up.  I said what I always say when Molly cries, "You know, Jesus didn't cry" (my "Away in a Manger" reference).  Most of the time that makes her laugh and then we figure things out.  Not this time.  This time she barked back at me right away, "MAYBE JESUS DIDN'T CRY, BUT JESUS SLEPT!"  Touche. 

Links...

Lessons from a failed church plant (HT)

5 cool church tools

I know it's last minute, but if you are near Columbia, Missouri you need to check out Karis Church's Theology Weekend.  It's this weekend and the speaker is Bruce Ware.

Jonathan Dodson: Deacon Training I, Deacon Training II, Increase the community in missional communities, Wisdom for planters, especially bivocational

Speaking of missional communities, consider Alan Hirsch's four points: INCH

The art of thank you note writing

Election Night stuff...

I enjoyed Obama's speech last night. It gave me goosebumps. It was like a Disney moment. I watched a sea of people who had the Obama-shaped hole in their hearts filled and wondered what the next four years will look like.

I just hope that Obama doesn't continue in the direction of his voting record. It's remarkable to me and deeply ironic that our first African-American President will be our country's strongest defender of treating unborn babies as less than fully human.

And I'm sorry, but Michelle Obama's dress was awful

Did you see the CNN election night hologram? Pretty cool...

Anyone miss Dan Rather? Me too...

Molly & Chiari Update - Halloween '08

Brain(I'm trying to write in a Halloween theme, so some terminology may be a bit creepy.  But beyond the fun it's really deadly serious. Molly asked me to put the graphic up to show how things are going.)

It's a scary Halloween for the McCoy family.  It started with a phone call at the stroke of midnight.  It was Dr. Frim.  Yes, we were expecting his late call.  But midnight is very late...scary late.

Dr. Frim was following up his nurse's phone call earlier.  The MRI's of Molly's skull and brains look good.  He can't find anything wrong.  That sounds like all treats, but it's really a trick.  Seeing nothing wrong when Molly has such evil symptoms means she is running out of options.  All Dr. Frim can do create a bloody mess by slicing open the back of her neck and fixing anatomical features to aid spinal fluid flow.  After that, it's a dead end.

Here's the plan.

1. Molly will have a spinal tap to see if her body's response to surgery has increased her spinal fluid pressure.  That could be the cause a lot of her problems.  I think won't reveal anything wrong, but it's still possible and is worth trying.

2. If #1 doesn't work, Molly will get a second opinion from a pediatric neurosurgeon at the University of Wisconsin in Madison (same place where she got the MRI). Dr. Frim respects the doc there and thinks he's a good, nearby option for trying to figure out what's wrong and what to do.  Problem is, Frim is the guy people go to when other options aren't as good.  When you start at the top there are few places to go...BUT DOWN.....MUHAHAHAAAAaaaa!

3. If #2 reveals something, we do what's necessary.  If it doesn't reveal anything, the last gasp will be to have Dr. Frim hack open the back of Molly's neck again and root around looking for anything that is not noticeable on the MRI but still a problem.  It's a re-exploration of the chiari hoping to find something.  He said about 1/2 of the time he finds something that fixes some or all of the problem, which means there's a 50% chance all that will happen is I do laundry for a lot longer.  That gives me the chills.

If the surgery reveals nothing and her symptoms don't get better, Dr. Frim basically said that we are out of options.  That's a frightening, but very real, possibility. We would then start looking at other things that may help symptoms, though those will probably not help all that much.

After the phone call Molly asked me if things might get bad enough where she would have to be in a wheelchair the rest of her life.  All I could do is tell her that I don't know.  This is as down as I've been in the 1 1/2 years we've been dealing with this stuff.  We are setting up spinal tap and second opinion appointments asap.  I'll keep you up to date.

Please pray for coming appointments and possible solutions.  Pray that we would be content with whatever God does.  Pray for opportunities to minister to others through all this.

Friends of Molly McCoy

Photo_103008_003After Molly's symptoms returned from Chiari I Malformation in July, we learned soon after that she would face a second brain surgery.  It was devastating to us, but the first surgery went so well and helped so much that we anticipated good things.  As you know, things haven't gone very well.  But that isn't the point of this post.

Before the second brain surgery was even scheduled we had some folks at our local elementary school (including the principal, office workers, and teachers) told us that they were planning a benefit for Molly.  Actually I'm not sure the word "benefit" was used, but they wanted to do some sort of fundraiser to help Molly and our family.  This was completely without provocation and without sharing of any family needs by Molly or me or the kids.  

Molly has invested much in the local schools and everyone there loves her.  Among other things she has served in the Parent Teacher Organization, heads up Market Day sales and distribution, has helped in every classroom of every kid in significant ways, and is the queen of giving scrumptious baked good for every single holiday to all the kids' teachers, the principal, the office workers, even the janitors!  Everyone there knows that Molly has no agenda but to love them and appreciate them and bless them and befriend them.  And now many of them have become good friends and chose to bless her right back.

After much work on their part they chose to start a "Friends of Molly McCoy" organization and develop a benefit dinner, which took place on October 23rd.  They initially hoped to get several hundred dollars to help with gas money and hotel and things like that. But this became bigger than anyone expected. 

Photo_103008_001 It started with a few friends at the elementary school.  Then new people joined up to organize and pull off the event, including some church members and other school teachers and workers.  Danny's teacher served food at the dinner.  Elijah's teacher helped organize the whole event and served at it.  Jack's teacher helped serve food and even was going around the school days before with a jug for people to donate money.  Even a teacher of Sarah's who has been very sick with her first pregnancy was there to serve food.  PTO friends served and donated much.  Several moms of other students got involved, including the notorious Woodstock "Mommy Mafia."  Don't ask. 

Everything they needed in planning the event was donated. The local Lutheran church hosted the event for free.  The food was all donated, including delicious spaghetti from Papa Saverios in Huntley, IL.  The former PTO president had shirts created with Molly's photo printed on it with "Friends of Molly McCoy."  All of the workers at the dinner were given a shirt.  Our worship leader donated his time to play music during the dinner.  People came to set up, tear down, clean up, serve food, prepare dozens and dozens of "take out" orders for those who didn't have time to sit and eat.  The event was advertised in many ways including all schools involved passing out event fliers to all parents and putting fliers up around town.

And what all of these friends of Molly did was bring in hundreds of people at $10 a plate ($5 for kids) and a lot more money than anyone expected!  It was unbelievable.  And there was even a 50/50 raffle that one of the workers won.  She immediately gave her 1/2 back to us. We saw church members there, our soccer team , former coaches from baseball teams, people from Molly's gym, the McHenry County College basketball team (coach is the elementary school gym teacher), and many others from various areas of life.

Today the three key organizers of the benefit from the elementary school came by and gave us a check for well over anything any of us expected.  We are just blown away, and I think they are too.

Add to all this a few other things I don't want to fail to mention.  We have continued to get meals by church and community friends on a regular basis.  Joe Thorn's church provided three big coolers full of frozen meals and a bunch of money for food.  We have also received money prior to and after the surgery from church members, community friends, parents of church members, people we don't really know, and our mechanic.  We've had a couple of teachers pay to have our house cleaned, which is going to happen soon.  Elijah's soccer coach helped organize donations through the soccer league.  They collected much of it from team parents and a paint jug with Molly's name on it.  Again, unbelievable. 

We know we probably missed some things we could mention here.  This isn't so much our "thank you" to those involved, though we say THANK YOU!, and are trying to do that in person and through personal notes.  This post is a public expression of gratitude to God for what He has done.  He has shown his blessing and grace in remarkable ways these last several weeks.  And I want to end by saying that I have learned about how to be invested in a community of people through my wife more than anyone. Thanks for your faithfulness to me, our family, our community, and especially our God.  I love you.

Spurgeon on Suffering, via Piper

SpurgeonJohn Piper's verbal biographies are wonderful.  I'm listening again to his bio of Spurgeon and just had to throw up a few quotes.  They are rocking me today in the midst of all the stuff our family is going through.  Here's the Piper audio, and the manuscript.

It would be a very sharp and trying experience to me to think that I have an affliction which God never sent me, that the bitter cup was never filled by his hand, that my trials were never measured out by him, nor sent to me by his arrangement of their weight and quantity.

Another...

I dare say the greatest earthly blessing that God can give to any of us is health, with the exception of sickness ... If some men, that I know of could only be favoured with a month of rheumatism, it would, by God's grace mellow them marvelously.

Molly Update and Lots-o-Links 10.22.08

Quick update on Molly.  She is finishing up her third round of steroids tomorrow, so we hope that will have a good result.  But as of today she has had more numbness/tingling in her legs than ever before.  Her balance issues are dramatic.  She is sleeping a little better, but not nearly enough yet.  It's still very worrisome around here, but God is our refuge (we read and prayed Ps 52 with our kids this morning).

Links...

Kung-Fu Election.  "Huck-uh-beeee!"

Good Wendell Berry website that I wasn't aware of until a few weeks ago.  New Wendell Berry Poetry.  New Billy Collins poetryPoems for autumn.

JD Greear - Multi-Site vs Church Planting.  Bill Streger - Great Questions for Pastors. Jonathan Dodson - Redefining Evangelism.

Questions to ask before confrontingPowlison on Friendship Counseling.

BibleArc.  Tom Schreiner taught me this at SBTS.  Could be a cool resource site. We'll see.

I have this ESV Study Bible.  Haven't used it enough to say too awful much (though I like what I've seen), but I do really dig the online version that is available for those who buy a hard copy.  Place for notes, highlighting text in different colors, and the full content of the study Bible.  I will use the online resource several times a week.  You should get one!  Westminster is a great place to buy books, especially ESV Bibles.

A Holy Longing: Beauty and the Gospel.

Total Church Conference audio is up.

Quick Update on Molly 10.16.08

Home from Molly's appointment.  It was about 9 hours of life for one appointment.  Wowwy.  No time to explain, so here's the dealio right quick.

Picked up the kids and headed out.  Stopped along the way to get some food.  Got to the University of Chicago Hospital on time.  Waiting room for 10 minutes, patient room for 1 1/2 hours (with 4 kids in there) before seeing Dr. Frim. 

Actually we saw a resident first, then Dr. Frim.  Lots of questions and a balance test, which Molly flunked big time.  Frim seemed a bit perplexed.  The three residents following his lead seemed bored, but they still laughed at my jokes so I think I made their night. :)

Dr. Frim thinks Molly is still struggling with some kind of chemical meningitis as a reaction to the foreign body (tube) he put in.  So yet another round of steroids is starting tomorrow and will last for the next 7 days.  Near the end of that other anti-inflammatories will begin. 

Dr. Frim changed Molly's nausea meds since that is a huge issue right now.  He feels quite sure it's directly tube related and will get better in the near future.  Also he is throwing a new insomnia medication at Molly hoping it will help her difficulty with sleep.  Her current one is helping a little, but not enough.  Still very tired.  Hope that will change now.  Of course Walgreens ran out (there's a sermon illustration there, don't miss it).  So I have to run to Wal-Mart in the morning to fill that prescription.

In the next couple of days we will be traveling to Madison, Wisconsin for another battery of MRI's.  Hopefully these will show if the spinal fluid flow is better, if there's swelling, etc.  Dr. Frim said Madison has good facilities there for the special MRI's Molly needs.  Wish we knew that last time around.  It will save a bunch of time and money to use Madison.  Plus Fuddruckers is on the way.  Woohoo! 

I asked Dr. Frim about what he thinks will happen at this point and he is still feeling that when some of the above issues are resolved a bit we will see improvement.  That remains to be seen, but let's pray to that end.  Because of the steroids we are still probably at least another couple of weeks away from knowing if the surgery was a success.  I'll update if/when something changes.

Thanks for the many encouraging notes on the blog, Facebook, Twitter, email, etc.  Appreciate all of you and your prayers so much as we struggle through this stuff.  God is proving His faithfulness again and again to us.

Headed to University of Chicago Hospital

Just wanted to give a heads up and ask for your prayers.  I talked with Dr. Frim's nurse this morning and they want Molly in their office late this afternoon.  Things with Molly are still very bad.  She essentially has all of her symptoms from before the surgery plus terrible nausea, increasing numbness, and more.  She is bedridden most of the time with short bursts of up time. 

We really need the Molly's neurosurgeon to figure out what's going on.  We need some answers and a bit of hope.  Please pray.

Molly Update 10.14.08

DSC_00112007-08-07Sorry not to update you all more, but not much has changed.  Molly is laying down most of the day because sitting or standing makes her dizzy/nauseous. She doesn't seem to be getting better from the surgery, or at least she has hit a sticking point.  A few days ago we heard from the doctor and it seems that they are growing a bit more concerned with Molly's recovery...or lack of. 

Maybe one day soon Molly will wake up and feel much better, but as of today she has all her Chiari symptoms plus some symptoms the surgery, is not sleeping much (at one point slept 2 hours in 2 days), and is emotionally drained.

We assume we will be making a trip to the city this week for a meeting with Dr. Frim to try to figure out what's going on.  Should know today, we think.  It's going to be a miserable trip if Molly continues to feel nauseous even when stationary.  We may need a barf bag donation drive.

Needless to say we are growing more and more frustrated and concerned.  Last year was a breeze compared to this. We see no light at the end of the tunnel.  It feels like things won't get better.  But we also know every rose has its thorn (yeah, I just did that...though I really mean every thorn has its rose).  Honestly, God is really teaching us a lot through this stuff.  It's provided chances to teach our kids things that would be harder to grasp if it weren't for Molly's problems.  Their uncoached prayers have really encouraged us.  And we know that through all of this God is working good (Romans 8:28 has been a family devotion passage recently).

Thanks for your continued prayers.

I want to say one more thing.  Some folks at our local elementary school (Mary Endres) decided before the surgery to have a spaghetti dinner to help Molly and our family.  They are planning food for 300 people!  Molly has been very (!) active in our local elementary school since we moved to Woodstock.  And now all the work she has put in and the relationships she has made are resulting in a great blessing during a difficult time.  We love our local schools, teachers, and workers.  We are very thankful for them.

Molly & Chiari Update 10.8.08

2925009598_e0fb5fc419Hey all.  Here's a brief Molly & Chiari update.  If you don't know what I'm talking about, read this.

Molly had surgery 1 1/2 weeks ago (Friday, 9.26...so 12 days post-op).  Her first two days in the hospital were unbelievably good.  She had energy, recovered quickly, and was happy.  So they sent her home.  Her last several days at home have been just miserable.  She lies down most of the time but isn't getting much sleep.  If she tries to stand up and do anything, or sit up and read or watch TV or whatever, she feels terribly nauseous and has to lie back down.  That makes her one very frustrated woman.  Add to that she has numbness in her feet and hands, regular headaches, and other symptoms of Chiari.  She also has some swelling near the incision.  Maybe the worst thing is that Molly has a strong appetite for foods that are difficult for me to find. :)

Molly and I have both talked to Dr. Frim's nurse a time or two, and have kept them abreast of how Molly is doing.  The accepted explanation is that when you put a foreign body into a human body stuff like this is how you feel for a while.  I told you while still at the hospital that this is what they thought would happen after she stopped taking steroids. 

Yesterday Molly woke up with some painful spots on her torso.  It's as if she feels like she has several bruises on her upper torso and arms.  Weird.  A call to the nurse led to Molly going to our local family doctor to seek a blood test to check for infection.  Our family doctor wanted to meet with Molly to check on her himself and gave us the "ok" on the incision (doesn't look infected from the incision point) and her vital signs.  He sent her to get a blood test and the results will be sent to Dr. Frim.

Dr. Frim called in another short round of steroids, including an initial big dose.  Molly took the big dose last night and will be taking more the next 2-3 days.  This morning she is feeling great!  Happy, chatty (too chatty), energized.  We know it's probably short lived once she stops taking them again, but it should help her recover a bit faster and at least feel better for a day or two.  I should also add that her torso pain is gone as of this morning. 

This has been a really difficult time for us.  We are all exhausted and concerned about whether or not Chiari symptoms will go away.  At least Molly's energy today gives me a chance to do some work on my church.  It's been very difficult to find time for that lately. For some context, here's my post 12 days post-op from last year's surgery.  Things were much, much better last time around. 

We appreciate all of you and your prayers for Molly.  Please keep praying.

Music Monday 10.6.08

I hope to get in a few more album/song reviews in the weeks ahead, but I've just been too busy with work and Molly stuff to get to anything of real substance for Music Monday's. That said, here are some great songs.This is a nice cover of "John Wayne Gacy, Jr." (Sufjan)...

Dang! Cut Copy with "Lights & Music" live on Jimmy Neutron's show. Crank it up, stand up, and dance along!...

I have no CD's or downloads from Marissa Nadler, but that may change soon. Great song...


Marissa Nadler - Famous Blue Raincoat from Greg Eggebeen on Vimeo.

I really like the Fleet Foxes, as my Music Monday posts have shown. Here they are with more glorious harmonies...

This one is for my wife who needs some post-brain surgery inspiration as she struggles with symptoms and recovery...